Thursday, September 25, 2008

please.shut.up.

Waiting for the prison bus this morning was a young woman with two children, one a little girl about 4, the other a baby about a year. The entire time she was waiting, she was talking on the cell. Nothing interesting that I could pass on to you my readers, you understand--though I admit I tuned out for a moment when I heard "...I wiped myself and then I looked..."--but it was an uninterrupted torrent of insipid gabbing. When the bus was coming, she hung up long enough to get her stroller on and pay, but before she even sat down (blocking the aisle with her stroller of course), she was back on the phone.
She kept talking nonstop until I was off the bus at least, totally ignoring her kids--the little girl pushed the stop button a couple times which her mother paid no attention to at all--and leaving me with one question. How the hell did she ever stop talking long enough to get knocked up not once, but twice? Or was the father(s) of those children just a strong believer in earplugs?
xoxo

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You mean you've never heard of Massachusetts' program of providing conjugal relations for the deaf?

Helps keep the streets free of the violent, sexually frustrated, aurally disabled. And also helps those who can't put a sock in it get laid.

It's a win-win for everyone.

Except those taking the prison bus, of course.

malevolent andrea said...

Ohmygod. I hadn't even considered the father(s) of those kids might be deaf.

On the other hand, I think this woman would then have learned ASL pdq. On the other other hand, I guess during sex you could just close your eyes to avoid "listening" to the signing.

Oh, it's another one of those prison bus mysteries that wil never be solved.