I had to buy my son a birthday card yesterday. This was not easy nor was I satisfied with the outcome, which is sorta ridiculous considering it is/was just a convenient place to stick some cash and (yes, we are white trash, shut up) some scratch tickets. But I like to make the effort and get a card which is not totally lame.***
We are not a mushy card kind of family. I mean, god knows, I am a hugger, and god knows, we say "love you" with some amount of frequency, and we even occasionally have a poignant moment when someone expresses heartfelt appreciation for someone else, but we do not give cards that say "oh, you're the best [relationship] a person could ever have!" It's just not in the family MO.
So I always try to get D funny cards for every occasion, usually with some kind of ridiculous cat or dog photo on the front. If lolcats ever develop a line of cards, I am right there, baby. But yesterday was a huge fail. All the "funny" birthday cards had one of two themes. Either oh-you're-so-old-haha or get-fucked-up-on-your-bday-haha. Those of us in our 40s can freely give and get the former to and from each other, but they're not really fitting for someone in their early 20s, you know? And the latter? It's really painful in some ways, but no, my son was not going to go out and drink beer and pick up women on his birthday, and joking about it would be ridiculously insensitive. And besides, even if he was, does your mom give you a card that encourages you to partypartyparty? No, she does not.
I ended up buying a very generic but graphically pleasing card from the $.99 line. Which is, I guess, fine. His present fit into it.
xoxo
***Did you know you aren't supposed to say "lame" because it's offensive to people who can't walk or some such shit? Srsly.
1 comment:
About "lame," etc. Y'know, when all these words have been unemployed for a while, and dissociated from their original meaning, perhaps we can recycle them in their satisfying snarky context.
Meantime, what DO we say? HB to D by the way.
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