1.) was attacked by the killer inchworms, but did not end up encased in a giant cocoon
2.) was mistaken for half of a lesbian couple by an extremely pregnant Italian mattress saleswoman
3.) got a wee little bit of sun on me despite the spf 30, proving I am the whitest white woman in North America
4.) bought a coaster with a photo of some '70s parents on it and the caption, "You kids put down that homework. These cocktails aren't going to refill themselves, you know." because alcoholism and child abuse are funny
5.) neglected my blog shamefully
xoxo
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