Have you seen Valerie Bertinelli's newest Jenny Craig commercial, where she's lost all the weight and she compares herself to a picture taken in 1980? Looking pretty damn hot there, Valerie. While Valerie is a couple years older than me n' Phoebe, I consider her a contemporary, so, y'know, way to go.
I've always liked her. I liked her when I was a kid and she was on One Day at a Time. I liked that she was married to Eddie Van Halen. I liked that she let him name their kid Wolfgang (because you are not telling me that was her idea). I just, for no real logical reason, like her.
I would totally invite her to poker with Drew Barrymore.
xoxo
4 comments:
Well, I'd totally invite Valerie Bertinelli to get naked with Drew Barrymore!
But I've always thought she was hot, too, ever since her sitcom days. Way hotter than Drew, who's just sorta vaguely cute in my eyes.
But I don't like Julia Roberts either, so what do I know?
Hey, careful about the cracks about
"couple of years older".
Besides the fact that I'm coincidentally at this moment listening to Ann Wilson hit harmonic perfection with her sister Nancy on Wolfgang's (no relation to WVH) concert vault from the height of her sonic corpulence, (concerts.wolfgangsvault.com), I've always been struck by my habit to become infatuated with raven-haired dark-eyed beauties with obvious appetites for life, as witnessed quite eloquently by both Valerie B and the incomparable Ann W. (Linda Ronstadt is another that springs to mind).
I think between Valerie's jaw line and her incredible eyes, she could carry two of herself and still be hot hot hot. My only complaint is how the weight can scare 'em into semi-seclusion, whereas the world would be a hell of a lot healthier place if they could show the rest of us how it's done. Of course, when they're svelte on top of the "all that" that they are, it's hard to catch breath.
Oh, yeah, that's right. Valerie's really old; she's your age. :-)
But, yes, even heavier Valerie was still a verrrry attractive woman. Now, however, she really does look like she did in 1980, and not in a weird overly Botoxed creepy Hollywood way, which is reassuring.
Can't believe I forgot!
Richard Thompson wrote a song awhile back entitled "Valerie" which is one of my all-time favorites. Can't say who he had in mind when he wrote it, but he began with the line "Oh, Valerie, you give me heart attack", and snuck in a few more about "If you don't get over this eating jag / They're going to take you home in a body bag / I can't stand to see one more calorie / Well I'm a-wait, wait, waiting for Valerie".
Damn, yet another piece of vinyl I can't rest until it gets digitized and digested onto my i-Pod...
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