Did he have a serious cardiac event or the like, or is he just down with the H1-swine whatever? Whatever it is, he'd better Get Well Soon, because I really can't deal with Sox games broadcast by other people. In fact, if D was awake right now--but he's not--I'd make him switch to hockey for me. Yeah, yeah, I know, I could scroll through my 900 satellite channels until I find whatever the hell station they have it on, but *in case you don't remember*, I'm lazy as fuck. So perhaps I'll just go take a bath instead and then read in bed. Or watch Hot Fuzz. (Any of you all see that? I love me some Simon Pegg, but it really wasn't grabbing me when I tried putting it on yesterday.) Yes, I do know my Friday nights are pathetic. Your point?
In other news, I do so love hearing men talk when they're (mostly) amongst themselves. I just observed a guy rhapsodizing about how blowjobs--being free, non-time-consuming, and extremely happy-making--are the easiest shortcut in the world for a woman to take if she wants to be perceived as a wonderful girlfriend, and asking what the analogous action for a man would be. Off the top of my head, I myself would suggest it would be spontaneously taking over some tedious chore for your woman that she absolutely hates (and knowing what chore that is). For most women, that would make you seem like a wonderful boyfriend/husband.
I also, in the same conversation, observed another guy saying that he has never, and will never, buy his wife flowers, because he thinks they are a waste of money, and she has "grudgingly" accepted that. Dude. People who don't understand the whole concept of gift-giving perplex and, I'll admit it, frustrate me. The purpose of giving people gifts is to show your affection for them by providing them something *they* like and enjoy. Whether you think that something is stoopid, silly, or a waste of money is immaterial. If Dude #2's wife likes flowers and would enjoy being gifted with them on one occasion or another, then Dude ought to suck it up and buy them, despite his distaste. I mean, geez, he might even get a blowjob out of it.
/relationship advice from single-loser-girl!
xoxo
P.S. How does spellcheck accept motherfucker as a word, but not blowjob? Oh, this is also perplexing.
4 comments:
For example, if I were there, I'd channel-swap you up to NESN (where the Bruins are having their way with Carolina) with a smile. ;-)
Oh, and Hot Fuzz? It starts incredibly slowly. Almost maddeningly so. But I will say, that when, in the last 30 minutes the movie gets rolling, every slow moment it took to build you up to it will finally make perfect sense, and you will absolutely love it all the more for it. Impatient people might want to fast-forward to "the good stuff", but I promise that the build-up makes the good stuff it even better.
Then what the hell NESN am I watching this Sox game on??!? (Obviously, I got distracted and am still on the couch :-))
Okay! I will re-watch the beginning of Hot Fuzz and stick with it. I trust your judgment on this. (Especially since Masterson just gave up a fucking grand slam and then another home run, so I *am* off this couch.)
NESN "plus" carries the Sox while the Bruins are on. Regular NESN has the Bruins. Except for Sunday, when the B's will be on Versus... Milan Lucic is DA BOMB
I'm completely puzzled as to how I found NESN plus without even trying or knowing that was what I was watching. But I suppose that is the upside of spending my shoe money on the expensive satellite package.
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