As my acupuncture treatment has gone on and been successful--with the anxiety and mood swings at least, if not in fixing my menstrual cycle and the hormonal crap that's underlying at least some of the mood disorder--we've been able to spread my appointments out. The first couple treatments were a week apart, then two, and now three weeks. I find it kind of interesting that, with tomorrow my first treatment since January 20th, I distinctly felt it "wear off" yesterday.
I know, you're thinking it's just a coincidence, or that I'm psyching myself into it, but I dunno. That moderation of mood disappeared sort of instantaneously and without anticipation. I came home from seeing Coraline Saturday night, and though it wasn't late, 9:30 or so, I'd been up since 5:45, and out of the house since before 7 am, and I was exhausted. So I caught up with what D and my dad had been up to, had some cocoa, and was in bed by 10:30 and slept like a log until the next morning. Woke up in an energetic and generally good mood, had coffee and breakfast and then, suddenly, bam.
Without anything really triggering it--certainly more triggering things had happened last week without significantly affecting my mood--I got thrown into that black pit of anger, disgust, and negativity. I ended up snapping at a friend in email, perhaps deservedly so, but over something I would have just rolled my eyes at and let pass without comment if I wasn't in a crappy, crappy mood. Going for a walk didn't make me feel any better, so I totally blew off all my plans for what I was going to do yesterday in lieu of taking a two hour nap. Because frankly, I didn't want to be conscious.
This morning I got teary over something that was, again, only slightly triggering. Right now all I can think is, Marcy! Fix me!
I suppose I should report back tomorrow night.
xoxo
9 comments:
Well, I started my morning bawling because I am 41 and have never had a healthy relationship. Made it really hard to make coffee. LOL
Anyways...hope Marcy can get your chi realigned.
Off to do some alternate nostril breathing to get my own back in order. (dont laugh, there is such a thing, and it is wonderful!)
I need to get back to my "yoga for dummies"--several notches below alternate nostril breathing, but useful, or something. I have this stubborn prurient thing about needles, so I suppose I'd have to get around that to benefit (constructively). Lying there and saying something like "oh do that again!" is likely counterproductive.
A, I call the "bam" thing "cat in the night," because it's as sudden and disconcerting as waking at night and stepping on your outraged cat. I've never been the bluebird of happiness ;) but sudden bouts like this are difficult to control. I'm all for naps in these situations, too: don't apologise for that.
And why does my gym only have yoga at 10 a.m.? BWAAA!!
Enough rambling
I don't know how to do alternate nostril breathing, but I've done circular breathing where you breath in and breath out to exactly the same count and don't pause at all. It's the not pausing at all that's tough. You feel like you're hyperventilating (and you probably are) but if you push past the initial panicky feeling, after awhile you just...go off. It's kinda awesome. But I don't have the discipline to do it at home by myself, and the breathwork classes I know of are kind of far away. And sorta pricy. And usually inconveniently early on a Sunday. Excuses, excuses, huh?
But anyway, does that sound anything like the alternate nostril breathing you do?
Uncle, I keep telling everyone...the acupuncture needles aren't anything like anything you'd associate as needles. They're so thin and flexible. Also, you barely feel them go in, if at all, (though sometimes in some spots I'll get a little weird but not unpleasant electrical feeling.)
What I'm trying to say is, I betcha they wouldn't make either the most ardent needle-philiac or needle-phobe excited in either a good or bad way :-)
No that doesnt sound like alternate nostril breathing.
Here's a link that describes it quite well: http://www.yogabasics.com/practice/nadi-sodhana-pranayama.html
I have started doing the variation we did at the new yoga place, beginning with breathing in one nostril and exhaling through my mouth,doing this for at least 10 breaths each side,then moving into the alternating breaths. I saw a couple videos on YouTube about it, but I dont have sound so cant guarantee their quality.
And, it will take a few times doing this to get into a rhythm,and even then you might mess up. But, as the owner of my new yoga place says..."It's all good."
Hope it helps. And good luck at Marcy's :)
This may be seconds, but Blogger seems to have eaten the first one.
I'm watching the acupuncture with close attention, mainly because there's some buzz about it as a neuralgia treatment.
Thanks for the link. I think all these various types of yoga breathing are interesting.
Acupuncture was good yesterday, though I was already feeling spontaneously somewhat better anyway. We'll see how my chi does today.
I've never been able to persist in sadness while at the same time holding a ukulele.
I'm thinking you had a pre-effect... your Qi got better because you were anticipating that it *would* be getting better.
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