Oh, Globe science page, endless generator of blog topics, I salute you. Today's headline: "Evolutionary curveball for curvy?" Apparently, a new study suggests that "women with straighter waistlines tend to be stronger, more assertive, and more resistant to stress." On the other hand, those of us who store more fat on our hips and thighs "give birth to smarter babies, since fat in those areas contains fatty acids key to infant brain development." Bulgy Polish catcher thighs FTW! I knew they were good for something more than just blocking the plate. D was a very smart baby.
In other junk science, apparently if you show men pornography before they go shopping they will buy more, because the pleasure centers in their brains that are activated by acquiring stuff are already cranked up and ready to go. But considering that those pleasure centers are also apparently stimulated by the free food on toothpicks the sample lady at Whole Foods is giving out (which also successfully induce people to spend), these pleasure centers seem kinda...non discriminating.
Okay, them's the Cliff Notes. Anything else you wanna learn from today's paper, you got to read yourself. But I know I personally will sleep better tonight just from knowing there's a biological explanation for me. Either that, or because I decide to drink the little mini bottle of Bailey's M1 gave me for Xmas. One of the two.
xoxo
10 comments:
I find it amusing that you blogged on the same article I sent J earlier today.
And, as I guessed, she was particularly amused by In more egalitarian societies, where women played a greater role in the economy, they also tended to have thicker waists.
However, this article also goes a long way to show that Evolutionary Psychology is pretty much a bunch of horseshit. It's basically "just-so" stories for contemporary adults and is inherently conservative, claiming, with essentially no serious scientific evidence, that all sorts of cultural behaviors are evolutionarily determined.
Bullshit: having two legs and stereoscopic vision are evolutionarily determined. Asking a bunch of frat boys in Psych 101 what body shape they like--the sort of "study" that forms the "evidence" for much of evolutionary psych--is pretty much guaranteed to get the answer you would expect: the current body ideal of late-adolescent American culture is a result of evolutionary processes.
You know, just like some people have two arms and some choose to grow three or four.
Yet all you have to do is look at one of those sub-Saharan countries where the bigger the woman is the better, mothers literally force-feed their daughters till they're as fat as possible so they'll get husbands to know that having any waist at all isn't important in all societies... unlike, say, breathing oxygen, which sure is evolutionary.
Or look back to the 1920s where the ideal feminine shape was a boyish straight figure with no breasts or hips... or 30 years prior where the idea female shape was a very exaggerated hourglass. Did evolution completely shift in 30 years? Or are those just cultural and fashion changes?
Most evolutionary psychology I've ever seen has no more actual reproducible, falsifiable scientific evidence than How The Leopard Got Its Spots and no more basis in actual reality. They look at something that happens in modern, Western, often Anglophonic cultures and then make up some bogus "evolutionary" explanation what often plainly seems to be fashion or applying solely to the cultural mainstream of our current society.
It may be a lot of things, including comforting the comfortable that the way things are now is the way they were always meant to be, and giving some sort of answer rather than the more accurate, but less scientific sounding "Why is it like that? We don't have a fucking clue..." but what it sure isn't is anything resembling real science.
Dude! I would think that you'd be a lot more disturbed by the watching porn + shopping = spending more money link, because I am absolutely sure that's gotta have something to do with how you ended up with that crappy, crappy iPhone. :-) :-)
Nah, the porn + shopping thing seems too silly to comment on. After all, how many guys want to do anything after they've had a climactic moment? If there is something they'll want to do, it's to do it again, not go spend money (well, unless it's on strippers).
Nope, the iPhone--currently the bestselling "handset" (if you know what I mean) in America--was bought purely to satisfy my technical, not physical, lust.
The fact that one could watch porn on it is purely accidental. ;-)
Um, I don't think they let you climax, I think they show you the porn, then send you shopping. Did you *read* the article??!? Anyway, I cannot believe you are seriously debating me on what was just an opportunity for me to harrass you, as usual, about that crappy, crappy expensive phone of yours.
Did you think I was seriously debating you, what with that mention of iPorn and all????
And no, I didn't bother to read the article, I trusted your summary would be more than sufficiently accurate. Plus, my assumption led to a funnier line. Although not climaxing would, I think, lead to men either spending even more money with strippers or buying lots of useless items from particularly attractive salesgirls--so perhaps that research is indeed applicable under certain conditions.
As for your harassment of my iPhone, I'll point out that I could not only potentially watch iPorn on it, I could even read iPorn on it. Which makes my iPhone waaaay more useful than your late 20th C. StarTac, no matter how many muffled many minute messages it happens to leave you.
I'm so cool, my phone is effin' *vintage*. ahahahaha
Anyway! Isn't time for you to start driving to one of those states where they do unspeakable things with CheezWhiz? You take care and have yourself a wonderful holiday, Mr Indemnity. Try not to accidentally call me from the road with that crappy, crappy phone of yours when you, like, shift position because your butt's falling asleep or something :-)
Hey, the only thing they with CheezWhiz near Philadelphia is ea...
Oh, you do have a point. :-P
Leaving in a bit, I'm waiting for a delivery of a Hannukah present from J. And my parents may be stuck in Chicago for days by snow, so what's the rush?
Hey, in my overpriced European car my butt never gets tired, unlike in my prior non-theft-proof reasonably priced Japanese car... But I'll put the iPhone in the center console just in case!
Have wonderful, snow-blown free, Holidays, too!
Did they also say such women are cheerless and bound to wind up twice divorced? (Oops, sorry, that's the alimony talking). If the scientists are asking, I'm a big fan of curvy moms these days, and pursue them every chance I get, especially after being shown pornography and turned loose in the mall. (I'll take one of those... And that one over there...)
Hey! I could be twice-divorced too. I'm sure my future contractor second husband won't be able to stand me for very long. ahahaha
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