Do you know what Santa brought me for Christmas? After it hasn't happened since July, and blood tests that showed my FSH was through the roof, and I gave the Benevolent L almost every tampon and maxipad I had in this house? That's right! My period! Should I be surprised? Probably not!
My theory is that my little mini-diet I went on to shed my bulking fat liberated some of the stored estrogen my chub cells were hanging onto and spat it out into my bloodstream.
What Santa (really my boss E) actually brought me today was a Christmas Eve deep tissue massage. Holy fuck, did I need it. I don't know if I mentioned it but I screwed up my right shoulder doing dips several weeks ago, and since then both my shoulders and my neck have been so tight I've been waking up with faux carpal tunnel syndrome from my brachial plexis being compressed. Fun times! Meanwhile I think I also tweaked my SI joint a little and my hips and low back got really tight too. So basically I was a mess. (I hope someone bought me the foam roller I put on my wishlist! I thought D would, but my Christmas present from him is the wrong size for it to be that.) I didn't realize till I was on the table today that my IT bands were also fucked. I could barely stand for her to touch them. Eek! Think that's contributing to the tight hips, kids? Anyway, my massage was very nice, though I kind of wish I had had enough prezzie money to spring for a 90 minute treatment.
Downtown Salem was surprisingly deserted today. Then I went to TJMaxx and found out where the populace was. Sigh. I decided at the last minute to get D a new hoodie because I realized the auxiliary one he wears when the one he likes is in the wash has a huge rip in the sleeve. And since I won't turn up the heat, it's the least I can do, right? While I was there I bought myself a Bruins hooded t-shirt for the gym from Santa. Then I went to the wine store for...oh, you figure it out. At the cash register, much like candy for children, they had tempting nips. I bought myself a mini
I hope all y'all get everything you wish and hope for...
...without any Grinchiness in your life to spoil it...
...and without your having to pimp yourselves out for prezzies...
And for those of you whose fondest Christmas wish is that I stop posting stoopid cat pictures, here is my present to you:
Feliz Navidad, mis dulces amigos y amigas.
xoxo
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