I already related this to Mr Barma, but I figure I need to share with the class. Because I know you all live to hear my little anecdotes. Ha!
So, this morning was War Against My Uterus, the Final Showdown (we hope). By which I mean to say, this morning was my "procedure", which is supposed to fix me. I was in preop, having various people come in and do things to me or for me, or to introduce themselves, or having me sign stuff. You know the drill. In comes my anesthesiologist, a middle-aged Chinese gentleman with quite the heavy accent, whom I learn is Dr Wong. Close behind him is the rest of the anesthesia team. Dr Wong apparently missed his true calling as a stand-up comedian when he decided, instead, to put people out for a living.
He says, as the three of them crowd into my little cubicle, "Do you think you're going to have enough people taking care of you? You know, you pay for me, these two come free. It used to be, you pay for me you get him ::points to other guy:: free, now you get both. How's this hospital making any money?" As I said to Mr Barma, he was pretty hilarious, and that was *before* I got any drugs.
I also predicted that when Mr Barma has his upcoming "procedure" (which has nothing to do with his uterus!), his anesthesia team probably won't be as entertaining. But who knows? Maybe they're all like that. Anesthesiologists are well known to have access to all the good drugs. Maybe you want to invite them to all your parties. Maybe they're guaranteed to regale your dinner guests with funny stories and witty repartee over cocktails.
But if any of those funny stories have anything to do with what they do to, or say about, the patients after they're out, I don't wanna know. As I was telling the Benevolent L, I went into the OR wearing only a johnny, and when I woke up, I was wearing a johnny and a pair of funky mesh underwear. Which, y'know, on reflection, is the *opposite* of what often happens when a woman is unconscious. Just sayin'.
Peace out!
xoxo
3 comments:
Not to pick on the details, but I most certainly did NOT get the story about any magically-appearing undergarments.
I know! You heard the part about the anesthesia team and not the underwear, and the Benevolent L heard the part about the underwear and not the anesthesiologists.
I didn't want you to be horribly disappointed and jealous when your surgery comes with neither stand-up comedy in preop holding *nor* throw-away mesh panties. C'mon now. :-)
I got the anesthesiologist comic, too, but at a diferent facility and of a different nationality. They must teach this, maybe to see how you're reacting.
Great concept, but they'd pumped me full of Versed when the routine started. I would have thought a papal encyclical was hilarious.
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