Monday, November 8, 2010

more conversational gambits

Yesterday M1 called a dear old friend of hers who is now living in Florida in a retirement community. This woman is into her eighties now, mind. When M1 called her, she expressed great joy at receiving the call, because something was wrong with her television. "It's not working?" M1 asked. Oh, no, it was working. It was working just fine. But the people on Fox News were...not the same. M1 gently and delicately explained that, well, it was Sunday, and so the regular weekday anchors probably would not in fact be on.

"I know it's Sunday," her friend explained indignantly. "But they're saying the wrong things." Oh. (Editor's note: this is the point at which in hearing this anecdote I started laughing so hard, I thought I might pee myself. Another point towards my going to hell, I'm sure.) Wrong things? Yes. And Obama caused it. By going to India.

Who knew? Barack leaves the country and the Fox News anchors are replaced by liberals. Or, possibly, robots.

M1, bless her, tried to diffuse this by putting Fox News on *her* TV, so they could compare. "Do you have a woman wearing a purple blouse on now?" No, hers was wearing *royal blue*! M1 started to get into TV monitor color variations but, I dunno, gave up and eventually got off the phone.

It makes me wonder if when I start getting demented, I'll go the conspiracy theory route. I'm still thinking I'll be more like the old woman with the too-much badly-applied blush and inappropriate sexy clothing, but you never know. The commie robots will probably have confiscated all our stretch pants by then.

xoxo

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