Friday, July 22, 2011

burning in my...

How's the killer heat wave treating you? I had to laugh, literally, this morning when I stepped out my front door at 6:40 am and my sunglasses instantly fogged up. It's like Cambodia! Or New Orleans. Truthfully, I haven't been to Cambodia, but I have been to New Orleans and yeah. Do you ever think about how people down there survived in the 1700/1800s? I remember being there in August at a convention (cheap hotel rates, obv) and as soon as I left the confines of the glacially air-conditioned Marriot, clad only in underwear, a dress, and sandals, I instantly turned into a giant walking puddle of sweat. Now imagine adding a corset and three layers of petticoats and such. No wonder those people hung onto the whole slavery thing. It was too damn hot to do anything for yourself. I myself would not have even had the energy to beat the slaves, so I'm sure nothing would have gotten done at my house anyway.

You want political correctness and good taste, go read another blog. God.

So, anyway, I just wanted to say, ooo, baby, it's hot out there. Stay hydrated and seek all the air conditioning you are entitled to as a citizen of 2012. But don't bitch. This is much much much better than it being January, with 10 degree wind chill, a foot of snow, and a tree in your driveway. Truth.

xoxo

2 comments:

Craig H said...

I disagree--give me 10 degree wind chill and a foot of snow each and every single time. (Driveways are purely discretionary, and the easy way never to have a tree in ones is to skip them right up front--condo living is easy).

Point number one: NO BUGS. (That alone settles any argument).

Point number two: You can always add another layer, but there's only so much nekkid you can be.

Point number three: Breasts always look bigger underneath winter clothing.

Point number three-A: Unwrapping presents is well more than half the fun.

What were we talking about again?

malevolent andrea said...

People who like winter are weird, man. ;-)

Point #1: Since I won the war against the ants in my house, me n' the insect world are in utter harmony. Mostly.

Point #2: Speak for yourself. hahahaha

Point #3: Optical illusions have *got* to be trumped by the amount of ACTUAL side boob I saw at the beach on Saturday. Some people don't know how to buy bathing suits that fit. Yous menfolk ought to use that to your advantage.

Point #3a: Okay, huddling together for warmth does have its advantages. I'll concede a point.

Knockers, apparently. :-)